Confession: The Wife Who Became The Sidechick

My True Story

This is my true life story that I am putting out to make wives or soon to be wives know the importance of keeping your husbands happy at home.


In The Beginning

My name is Rose (names are changed to withhold identities) and my husband I will call John.  John and I met when we were both attending a prominent University in Kingston, Jamaica.  I am blessed with dark-skinned with small waist, a d-cup bust, wide hips and big bottom.  Due to these characteristics, I was not liked by most of my female colleagues so I mostly sticked to the males; this is how I became friends with John.  Now John is not your ‘tall, dark and handsome’ guy; he is a short, somewhat lanky copper-colored guy.  John was however, a charming young man; his personality was everything.

John and I operated like best friends; we did classes together, went to church together and would encourage each other.  John was a ‘girls man’ but there was one girl that he said he had interest in; Joy.  John would share with me his feelings for Joy and I would encourage him to do right by her.  They started a relationship which John said dwindled down over the years.

As the years progressed, John started expressing interest in me which I was happy about because I had feelings for him also.  He made it clear to me that the relationship with Joy was over and we decided to give us a chance.  At that time, I was a virgin as I was a Christian and have never dated anyone seriously.  John and I started going out on dates and got serious in our relationship.  As we were friends before, we knew a lot about each other.  We both met each other’s family and made our relationship official.  John proposed to me and we got approximately 6 months later.

We got married in front of our close friends and families and on my wedding night, I lost my virginity to the love of my life, John.  John patiently taught me how to be good in the bedroom and we were having so much fun.  I was in a great job and John was doing good for himself also, so were living a good life.  We invested in things together and were living as a team. We eventually migrated to a different country. Our marriage was blessed with 3 children (2 boys and a girl) and I was like yes, I have the perfect marriage.  I stopped working to become a housewife which was going good as my husband took very good care of his household.  Little did I know, that there is no such thing as a perfect marriage and that a marriage is like a plant that needs to be watered to remain healthy.

When it all Starts Crumbling Down

John is a very sexually adventurous person who will want to try different ‘sexcapes’.  I remember one night we were on a highway driving and he stopped on the side and asked for us to do a ‘quickie’ just for the adventure of the cars passing by.  I told him hell no, that is nasty and distasteful; he looked at me and said that’s a part of spicing up a marriage.  I told him that the bedroom is where all spicing must be done and he just smiled.  Overtime he would come with some requests outside of the ‘bedroom’ and I would turn him down.  I remember one day we were alone at home and he asked me for a ‘do’ on the back porch and I turned him down.

One day we were talking and he said that he was bored and want for us to do more things to spice up our sex life.  I was like, are you crazy John? I have to be taking care of 3 children, a house and fulfilling your sexual needs.  His response was always, “Rose make time for your husband”.

I was of the impression that John could never find no other woman like me because I came into his life a virgin and have been taking good care of the family; oh how I was wrong.  I became very self-centered and egotistic.  I knew John loved me so I was not afraid that he would leave me; he just needed to abide with my timing.  Several times he would tell me that I am driving him away and I would just ignore him.  I had a friend who I would talk to and she would tell me that John will never leave a wife like me; that gave me even more confidence to ‘do me’.  I remember John requesting that we go do counseling because he sees where the marriage is going down; I told him that he needs counseling to learn to appreciate a good wife.

I was lost in a fantasy world because I would be at home in the days watching the lifestyles of the ‘rich and famous’.  I started desiring things that those men gave to their wives/fiancés.  I wanted to be greeted with roses, chocolates, fine wine, etc.  I shared with John that I wanted those types of treatment and he was happy and said no problem; he would do anything for his marriage to work.  One night John came home with flowers, but not the kind I saw on the TV; I was so upset that I just threw them down.  The expression on John’s face was priceless, I remember he tried saying something and I just closed the door.  He tried making little gestures, but they were not like what I would see on the TV so I would not appreciate them.  I told John he needs to go look at how these men treat their wives; he just looked at me and shook his head.  At times I would imagine myself dating these men because of the lifestyle.  I would even bring up leaving John.

John works in the technology sector and has multiple jobs so sometimes he would travel to different states or countries.  Because I was so confident in my looks and myself, I would never think that John would go outside of this marriage.  I started noticing that John was no longer asking me for sexual pleasures; sometimes I would even try teasing him and he wouldn’t even look at me.  Still being my usual conceited self, I just think he was being spiteful so I ignored him.  The trips away started getting more frequent and longer and the rejection started getting worse.  I also realized that he was travelling back to Jamaica a lot; he would say it is for work purposes.  I would ask him what the problem is and he would say he is just busy and tired; I started doubting him.  John’s behavior was getting really off. I decided to do an investigation into John’s behavior so I hired a private investigator.

The Truth to Light

What I found out about my husband was beyond terrible; not only was my husband cheating on me but he was cheating with Joy.  In the time I was there being conceited and neglecting my husband, he was there rekindling his old flame.  John and Joy seemed to be having the times of their lives. The pictures and videos showed nothing but happiness on my husband’s face; something that I have not seen on him in years.  This hurt me to the core and made me very bitter.  I felt like dragging him through the divorce court and taking him for all he has.  What crushed me the most was when I told John how I felt, he said he is willing to lose it all; he will ensure that the kids are taken care of.  It was at this point that I realized that I destroyed my family.

A Little Too Late

I really love my husband and decided that I will not allow my marriage to end, but John told me that he is no longer in love with me and that he is happy with Joy.  I ask him what will it take to get the marriage back and he says there is nothing I can do to remain his wife because his heart is no longer there.  John says the only way I can be in the picture is to be on the side.  I am now here contemplating how I am going to act as a side chick to win back my husband’s heart.






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