Dear McKoy: I’m HIV Positive and I Don’t Know How to Tell My Wife

Dear McKoy: I have been HIV positive for a few months, and I accidentally infected my wife but she doesn’t know. I found out about my diagnosis a couple days after she and I had unprotected sex. Since then, I’ve been coming up with all sorts of stories to use a condom. I am very afraid to tell her because our marriage is going well. I look healthy on the outside but I know that she must have it too. She hasn’t been experiencing any odd symptoms (at least not yet) but I know she will eventually. I am dreading that day. I probably caught it from a prostitute because I used to buy sex a lot to satisfy my insatiable sex drive. I feel like I’ve failed myself and my family. My children probably won’t live to see me get old. It’s been eating me up and this is my first time telling someone. What should I do?

C.B.
Dear C.B.: I know it is hard but the best thing for you to do is to tell her. She will find out eventually as you said. If you really love her and your family as you say, you’ll be honest. She needs to get proper treatment from the start. Remember that living with HIV isn’t the end of the world and you need to just take care of yourselves to live as long as possible.
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