Dear Mckoy: Boyfriend Beats Me Up For Sex- I’m 27 and living with my 36 years old boyfriend. Since the announcement of the COVID-19 here in Bull Bay St Andrew, my boyfriend and I are constantly going at it because I made a decision not to have sex until I feel safe enough to do so, but, he doesn’t agree with my decision. He constantly keeps beating me up and is accusing me of wanting to go give my “good good” to another man- which isn’t true.
I’m just being scared of this virus that’s been affecting so many lives, and, believe the best way to protect myself is to avoid close contacts especially knowing he’s a person that is always in a group of companies.
Now he’s saying if I don’t want to give him sex I’m to leave and go find somewhere else. I don’t have family here and my salary isn’t enough to maintain me with a place on my own.
Please I ask for your advice…
I hope you are doing well at this time. I know you must be feeling quite distraught to know someone who you may love and care for is unable to see your concern re your own personal health and safety.
I can tell you that any man that is accusing a woman of cheating is suffering from some level of insecurity. I would recommend finding an alternative to reach with your boyfriend. I know you would be against the decision of leaving him because of your housing situation; however, I would like to bring to your attention your safety re the domestic violence situation, and, health relating to his disregard for the COVID-19 outbreak.
In light of this, I would recommend trying to educate him to your concerns in a calm and deliberate way. Create standards that should be met before you initiate intercourse, such as, ensuring he showers before. These are simply ideas that can be negotiated to both supplement your safety to a degree and his needs.